We are gathered here today because SOMEBODY *glares at coffin* couldn’t stay alive.
I hate when I misplace my glasses because then I’m forced to walk around looking like I’m suspicious of everything in the room
whattabout you, cabinet? huh, you sketchy piece of shit? did you take ‘em?
"I swear, you two might as well be sleeping together with how well you know each other." Angela says as she retreats to the kitchen. Behind her back, Maura and Jane share knowing looks.
*gets gay married during the purge*
has this been done yet
sometimes when I’m having a bad day I think to myself “at least I’m not a heterosexual” and I feel a bit better
Teen Wolf AU → Allison comes back but has no memories of anyone, but they all remember her.
I wanna meet someone’s who’s going to be like ‘hey wake up I’m taking you on an adventure’
Curious Lion cub investigates and smiles for the camera.
*swallows a watermelon seed* *thinks about that episode of Rugrats*
i keep my phone on at all times just in case nev and max calls because someone done used my selfies
-you smell different when you’re awake
-please help me (then smile as if nothing happened)
-you have lovely skin, I can’t wait to wear it
-your hair tastes like strawberries
-he knows, don’t go home.
-I always knew you would die in my arms
-every time I poop I think of you
-no one will ever believe you
-I killed mufasa
-I bet you didn’t feel me lick your ear
-mother told me it would be like this